Aku Nak Yang Betol Betol Hot. Sukahati Mulot Memang Nak Kena Cili.

Oh.

Aku suka yang betol betol hot je.

Yang tak hot, aku tak suka.

Sila alihkan yang tak hot tu daripada pandangan aku.

Seriously.

Ya.

Memang aku memilih.

Sukahati aku la kan?

Aku nak kepuasan yang maksimum.

Kalau tak hot, nescaya aku tak dapat apa yang aku nak.

Ya.

Kepuasan itu yang aku cari cari.

Isk.

Aku betol betol benci kalau tak hot.

Kadang kadang rasa macam nak lempang je.

HohO~

Aku tak kejam.

But, itu pendirian aku.

Lol~

Salah ke?

Salah ke kalau aku nak yang hot hot je?

Aku rasa tak salah kot.

Sukahati la aku nak makan yang pedas pedas je.

Aku tak suka makanan yang tak ada feel pedas pedas tu.

Uits.

Kau tahu, aku tak sah kalau tak mintak cili padi potong satu mangkuk.

Mulot aku ni memang nak kena cili je.

Duh.

Nikmat gila la kalau makan pedas pedas ni.

And, aku wajib sebot saya nak pedas gila gila tak hingat dunia ye.

Erk.

Setakat pedas sipi sipi tu, aku gelak gelak gemok je.

Oh. Aku tak gemok lagi.

HohO~

Aku tak layan la kalau setakat pedas pedas celah gigi tu.

Khasiat cili.

Nak berkongsi sikit.

Aku curi info ni daripada siapa entah aku pon tak tahu.

Boleh?

Oh. Cili pun ada khasiat jugak.

HohO~

Cili boleh menyembohkan bisol dan luka.

Ya.

Kalau kau bisol kat punggong, kau sapu la cili kat punggong kau.

Erk.

Melompat la kau kepanasan punggong nanti!

HohO~

Bukan sapu cili tu okay.

Kau kisar daun daun cili then sapu la kat bahagian bisol tu.

Boleh kot elok bisol tu.

Dan jugak dapat mengurangkan sengal sengal otot dan bengkak bengkak.

Oh. Kalau sengal sengal otak pulak kau boleh guna cara lain.

Plus, sebiji cili yang direbus, airnya dapat merawat ulser mulot.

Oh.
Jangan kau campak segenggam cili nak rebos.
Nescaya bibir kau jadi bibir muncong spesies itik dan jugak angsa.

Lagi satu, bukan suroh kau minom sampai habis.

Kumur kumur je kot.

Lagi satu, akar cili boleh direbus.

Then, kau minom bagi melegakan cirit birit dan sakit darah tinggi.

Selamat mencuba ye kawan kawan!

Oh.

Aku tak cuba lagi.

HohO~

Bila Dia Buka Mulut Dan Aku Tak Faham Langsung. Duh.

Oh.

Tadi ada satu peristiwa.

Tak ada kaitan dengan April Fool okay.

I just don't play fool.

Stupid.

HohO~

Anyway, aku nak solat Zohor tadi.

So, aku pergi la surau kat Fakulti Bahasa.

Oh.

Aku bukan nak buat tutorial about how to mendirikan solat.

Sengal.

HohO~

By the way, aku sedang menunggu masuk waktu Zohor ni.

Entah tak tahu dah masuk ke belom.

Jeng jeng jeng.

Sila buat buat saspen dan ekspresi muka konon terkejot opocot.

Okay.

Tiba tiba...

...ada seorang lelaki masuk.

Oh.

Takkan pulak perempuan nak masuk surau lelaki kot?

Gila?

HohO~

Erk.

Then, dia bagi salam.

Assalamualaikum.

Waalaikumussalam.

Okay.

Tak pernah pulak tengok muka rakyat Malaysia macam ni.

Mix kot?

HohO~

Kemudian, dia bersuara lagi.

Jamak. Jamak.

Erk.

Aku tak nak solat jamak.

Isk.

Aku bukan musafir la.

Ke aku salah dengar?

Dia suruh aku samak menyamak kot?

Oh. Tak mungkin.

Hurm.

Maksud dia...

...solat berjemaah?

Mungkin jugak.

Okay.

Selesai dia mengambil wudhu'.

Dia pun datang ke depan.

Nak solat la kan?

Takkan nak berjoget mak enon pulak.

Oh.

Aku bagi la isyarat supaya dia jadi imam.

Dia pun cakap something.

Akim. Akim.

Oh.

Aku bosan dengan cintamu.

Aku rasa buang masa.

Akim tu ke?

Kepala hotak kau!

HohO~

Okay.

Now I know who he is.

Ya.

Aku kat Fakulti Bahasa.

I guess he's a lecturer that teaches Arabic language.

And he's not from here.

Maybe he's from somewhere in Jordan.

Or mana-mana la.

HohO~

That's why he cannot speak Malay or English.

But Arabic.

Fuhhh...

Then, aku pun start iqamah la.

Nasib baik aku tak habiskan lagu Bengang si Akim tu.

Boleh?

Duh...

Susah betol.

Kalau tak faham langsung kan?

Nak buat macam mana?

Lantak.

HohO~

Dia Yang Tersingkir. American Idol Top 10: The Results.

Oh my.

Seriously?

Duh...

I don't think that she has to leave the stage.

Not for now.

Even though her performance last night was not so hot.

But, I think she deserve one more chance.

HohO~

Anyway, good luck dear.

I'm your fan.

So, you know who is she?

Siobhan Magnus?

Katie Stevens?

Didi Benami?

Crystal Bowersox?

She is...

...a girl.

HohO~

Okay.

Stop talking.

She is...

...Didi Benami.

Oh.

She was sent home this week.

Duhhh.

Not another girl.

You know, the judges once said that this year is going to be for the girls.

But, three girls were sent home already.

The boys? None of them.

Okay.

Maybe this year one of them will be the winner.

Which one?

Oh.

Maybe Casey James.

Or Lee Dewyze.

Big Mike? Naaa...

By the way, I was disappointed with some performances.

• Siobhan. Oh. She was trying too hard. Dan dia nampak tak selesa kat atas pentas. Maybe she was too nervous to perform as she was the first contestant of the night. Poor her. Aku harapkan yang lebih hebat daripada dia. Or maybe next week okay?
• Casey James. I love him. As a performer, sangat menarik bila tengok dia beraksi kat atas pentas. Seriously. With his guitar, he's a star. Oh. This is not a poem. Erk. But, like the judges said, lagu tu tak menonjolkan his vocal ability yang sebenar. I like his tone.
• Big Mike. Aku minat gila lagu ni. So in love with this song. FYI, lagu ni pernah digunakan sebagai lagu latar bagi drama GHOST lakonan Cheryl Samad tu. Ready For Love by India Arie. Memandangkan aku dah memang suka dan gila kat lagu ni, so, aku secara tiba tiba suka pulak with his performance.
• Didi Benami. Hurm. I'm begging you, please bring your guitar! Duh. That's was not great at all. Sedih. I love her.
• Tim Urban. Seriously. Aku tak berhenti gelak sepanjang dia menyanyi. Duh. Dengan face expression yang macam sengal, I just don't get it. Urghhh...
• Andrew Garcia. Finally. He's giving the best. He's back on the track. But, I'm not his fan.
• Katie Stevens. Cute girl. She's good. But, I don't think that she has the soul to sing that song. Ya. Lagu tu terlalu berat untuk dia. And it was a boring performance. Seriously. The great thing about her is the voice tone. Lain daripada yang lain.
• Lee Dewyze. Another great performance. Finally.
• Crystal Bowersox. Good job. Still, I'm not your fan. But, you are amazing!
• Aaron Kelly. Urghhh... Aku kecewa lagi. Tak best. I prefer Kris Allen's version.

And I don't know la.
This season macam kurang great talents.
I mean talents yang betol betol amazing dan wow.
Oh.
Seriously.